I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I am in a vortex of obligation.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
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he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
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I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.