i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.