so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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