1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize