so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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