sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.