i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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