that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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