We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
