Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
