I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?