I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize