Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me