you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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