ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
