We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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