I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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