well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I think im going to throw up on grandma
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize