just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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