wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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