Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
