What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize