Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator

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  (586): But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn? (586): Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator http://tfl.nu/x5ch
  Replies (2) Good night (1368) Bad night (675)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...

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  (407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star... http://tfl.nu/jbo8
  Replies (534) Good night (135921) Bad night (6502)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.

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  (302): Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters. http://tfl.nu/m9v3
  Replies (8) Good night (4073) Bad night (665)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2

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  (304): alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2 http://tfl.nu/q6v7
  Replies (120) Good night (6773) Bad night (1053)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired

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  (403): i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired http://tfl.nu/1gf1
  Replies (18) Good night (4232) Bad night (1872)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."

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  (478): All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk." http://tfl.nu/3sim
  Replies (10) Good night (3413) Bad night (1228)
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  (925): View more from California

  Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard

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  (925): Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard http://tfl.nu/2caa
  Replies (14) Good night (4092) Bad night (1029)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade

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  (678): i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade http://tfl.nu/l2g0
  Replies (10) Good night (2062) Bad night (859)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.

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  (978): I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk. http://tfl.nu/so98
  Replies (13) Good night (1839) Bad night (663)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.

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  (318): Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass. http://tfl.nu/dq3p
  Replies (8) Good night (1387) Bad night (599)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.

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  (908): I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling. http://tfl.nu/t9ar
  Replies (6) Good night (1427) Bad night (547)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.

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  (870): When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody. http://tfl.nu/gc8j
  Replies (5) Good night (539) Bad night (437)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world

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  (416): Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world http://tfl.nu/enih
  Replies (10) Good night (722) Bad night (1049)
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  (315): View more from New York

  He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.

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  (315): He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate. http://tfl.nu/3a8i
  Replies (5) Good night (870) Bad night (271)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...

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  (320): God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier... http://tfl.nu/hw83
  Replies (2) Good night (673) Bad night (320)

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