I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
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her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
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Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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