i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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