I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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