another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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