Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize