i just had sex bonerless
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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