I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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