the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
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