the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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