I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?