if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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