i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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