put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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