How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
I am invincible.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.