You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
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I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
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I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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