I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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