I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
