Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.