I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight