i was born a porn star she said
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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