Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
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Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
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Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize