oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize