I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize