I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost