haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
babies were throwing up all over the place
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Randomize