the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
