I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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